i don’t really think about it. in the past i had sex because it felt good. i don’t regret any sex that i’ve had. but now i want something more and i’m willing to wait for something more.
i mean, i think i’m pretty amazing in the sack, so yea, i think people who have been with me were blessed lol but i never made love except for with my ex, and even now i don’t think it was making love because i wasn’t in love with him. i loved him, but i wasn’t in love
i had a conversation with a friend the other day and talked about how abstaining makes the little things more passionate. i told her that i was out with my boyfriend and his family and just holding his hand and kissing him, even gently, lit me on fire. i think the sex he and i will have will be very passionate and special and blessed and i’m excited about it
so yea, i don’t think about the sex i’ve had in the past. it really feels irrelevant. i’m not saying i’m a completely different person, but most of the sex i had was before i was 18. i was celibate for 3 years in college and had one boyfriend after college. so meaningful sex, soul changing sex is still to come :)
and finally you’re right, i do treat my body like a temple. when i was having sex i was so frightened about STDs i’d always use protection and got tested often. i never had sex with someone i didn’t trust or didn’t know well. i never degraded my body and as i got older, i made sure my pleasure and comfort were a top priority. and i never compromised who i was to have sex. i now want a deeper more spiritual sex because i’m a deeper more spiritual person. but all through my sexual life, i’ve always treated my body with respect.