Hey!!! I'm in a relationship now, and we've both agreed no sex until marriage. How do you and your boyfriend keep that promise to God? Especially being in a ldr? Like examples of ways to keep the relationship exciting, I guess? Thank you for answering!!!! (:
It’s really not that hard and the choice to abstain was not difficult because it wasn’t just our choice to make, but what the Lord guided us to do. Not having sex has caused us to be intimate in other ways. Spiritually and emotionally, we are closer to each other more than any one on earth. He’s my boyfriend, but he’s my best friend, my partner in crime. I love spending time with him, doing new things but also doing the things that feel so familiar and comforting. Things are exciting because every day I realize new things about him and new ways to love him. I do not feel like anything is missing. In fact, my relationship fills me in a way that is hard to describe because I’ve never felt this way before. Loving him is easy and yes, I do have times when I just want to jump his bones and do stuff to his beard. But we’re working towards something amazing. And that’s pretty exciting to me.
That question about beyonce being a role model to black girls is so coincidental to me. I just attended a forum this evening about whether or not beyonce could be considered a feminist. Within that forum it was brought up that beyonce really doesn't do much to proclaim or reach out to black woman/girlhood. In fact she does things deliberately to negate the black image of herself. Including allowing her skin to be lightened. Her focus is often on woman power rather than black woman power.
Then don’t look to her as a role model. I’m not getting into this because I’ve addressed this before, but I think she’s a role model. You do not have to agree, but I’ve made my perspective clear
I just turned 20 and I've never been in love or even been with some intimately. I feel like I'm not living my life. Like I'm just going with the motions; school, work, family. It literally makes me so sad to know that no one has ever loved me. But I'm the type if person to play it off like it's not a big deal. I'm sorry, I have no idea why I'm telling you this. You just seem like someone with a huge heart that gives dope advise.
I didn’t fall in love until I was 24, didn’t meet the man of my dreams until I was 23. Even still, there are people who don’t find love until they are in their 30s, 40s, etc. Love has no timeline
I urge you to focus less on what you don’t have and appreciate what you do. There are people who love you with everything they have. Not being in a relationship doesn’t mean you are not loved
You should focus on preparing your heart for love and preparing to give love. Busy yourself making you a better you and you won’t be just waiting for love, but actively living when love is ready to find you
Hi Nissi, hoping you can give me a bit of advice. I have been living a vegan lifestyle for the last month. I finally told one group of my friends (when they asked me why I wasn't eating more) and they basically mocked me. I got very defensive and I was rude. Did you have handle any shade for going vegan? How would you/did you handle it? I don't want to alienate my friends but it makes me angry that I have to defend a personal (and good) decision?
na my friends don’t really go in on me. many of them are actually quite accommodating, making sure i have food options when we go out. i have a few people crack jokes, but my friends tend to crack on each other all the time so i don’t take it seriously. they know that my decision is important to me, and they respect that choice because they respect me
For lent I am giving up negative criticisms and negative thoughts. I am too critical of everything, especially myself. I used to be a very positive person but in the past couple of years I have sunk into a dark place and I am going to change that! I don't think it's going to happen over night, I will have to work hard at it but if I focus on the many blessings in my life I will do it!
that is an amazing goal! i really wish you all the best and success on this endeavor. positive thinking can really change your life
Just wondering what you think of Beyonce? Do you think she is a role model for Black women?
she is absolutely a role model for black women. she’s not perfect, and she doesn’t need to be to be someone for people to look up to. she’s a mother, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a business woman, a mentor, a philanthropist. she wears many hats and deserves respect
Hey! I love your blog and I appreciate you for always putting these anonymous and ignorant haters in their place. I admire your dedication and commitment to school and your constantly growing relationship with God. Oh and all the post about you and your boo always put a smile on my face. Thanks for your honesty and inspiration!!
thank you for the kind words hun. i’ve very open about my beliefs and what i stand for and i appreciate that you see that effort and respect that. you’re so sweet :)
The person that I'm in a relationship with can't find a job and haven't been able to for a while. Since that has happened,our relationship has suffered. We're in different states and don't talk much. We don't text anymore either so it's very hard. If we do talk we laugh,talk about our future together,say I love you and it's like things never changed but it's clear that they have. I've talked about it but him not having a job,so he says,is still the issue. I don't know what to do. Any advice?
your partner needs support on the job search, not criticism. in this economy, getting a job is not just a simple formula to follow. it’s important to be a source of encouragement above all else.
but communication is a whole different issue. communication is important, whether or not they are looking for a job. life is hard and there will always be ups and downs, but not talking and growing is really not going to make situations better. if you think things have changed, superficial conversations aren’t fooling anyone. be bold and invest in your relationship. speak up and talk to them about it.
for the person who asked about honey not being vegan (other than the whole staying away from animal products) a lot of the bees are mistreated - wings torn of the queen to keep her trapped in the hive- there is a list out there somewhere. i wondered this as well when i was going vegan and it turns out that the bigger honey productions also practice animal cruelty, though i don't know about the people working there, but i wouldn't be surprised
you're SUCH an inspiration. i always love your answers you're so eloquent and concise yet at the same time you can be the silliest person. im just so happy to see you on my dash i wanted to make sure you know! :)
aw thank you sweetheart! I’m glad you like the blog and i really do appreciate the kind words
i know how you feel about the short hair thing, i just cut mine four months ago and i just evened it out maybe 3 weeks ago. sometimes i miss weave but honestly this is the best thing for MY hair, I'm just so self-conscious about how short it is sometimes. i'll go to school with it out but rarely do i take pictures until i get used to it.
I'm giving up desserts. I haven't observed Lent since my Catholic school days, but this is part of my journey of building a stronger relationship with God. Sweets are my biggest weakness, and I know this will be a challenge. On the flip side, I look forward to praying and having more clarity. That trumps the need for the sweets. But Lord, do I love a good cookie!
amen! i’m not specifically catholic but the bible calls us to fast and to make room in our lives for Him to do work, so i’m jumping in as well. i applaud you for giving up what is hard for you to give up, not just what is easy.